Episode #1 : Preamble Me Back to My Habitual Adobe
Written by : Glenn Davis and William Laurin
Directed by : John Fawcett
Michael Riley as Brett Parker - Kari Matchett as Colleen Blessed - Gordon Pinsent as Duff McArdle
Dean McDermott as Mark Simpson - Caterina Scorsone as Michele Parker
Normand Bissonnette as Al Tremblay - Lori Alter as Renata Delassandro - Krista Bridges as Rose Thorton
Jonathan Rannells as Todd Maplethorpe - Al Waxman as Lloyd Gormand - Greg Spottiswood as Joe Harriman
Don Cherry as Jake Nelson
Transcribed by : Gen <firstname.lastname@example.org> from the CTV
When it aired on Showcase, there were a few extra scenes/lines that are transcribed in red below.
We see scenes of winter and kids playing hockey.
Narrator : It was born from the land, an expression of joy and community in the face of bleak winter. It is a game, yes! But also a tribal ritual, a blood bond handed down from generation to generation...
Brett Parker steps in front of the screen.
Brett Parker : Kill it, kill it.
He turns around to face a meeting table at Parker Sports Management, New York.
Brett : What the hell was that?!
Joe : It's the new opener for the network's play-off coverage.
Brett : Joe, we're supposed to sell fire on
ice, you know, this was... this was kids with frozen snot! Who
Joe : Well, Ian is the director.
Brett : Ian, where is Ian?
Ian raises his hand. Brett walks towards him.
Brett : Listen, with a name like that, you wouldn't by any weird chance be Canadian, would you?
Ian : What does that matter, hockey is universal, eh? And when they...
Brett : He said "eh." Get him outta here! I said get him outta here!
Ian is dragged out of the meeting.
Brett : How many times do I have to tell you
people : you do not hire Canadians for these jobs, they
don't have the first clue how to sell hockey. In fact, they don't know anything about hockey. Must I
do everything myself?
In Brett Parker's office, Joe is talking on a cell phone.
Joe : They run that opener and the sunbelt's gone before the tip-off.
Brett : Yeah, I know that Joe, and it's called "face-off."
Joe : Your secretary said Andrea called about dinner at 7:00 at Levana on West 69th, you better get going.
Brett : Yeah, well, not before I roast the board of directors, the network needs those rules changes
Secretary (on intercom) : Mike Dirk on two.
Brett : That's stiff - that guy's "Q" is practically nil, we have to drop him. (Takes the call.) Dirkie, buddy, how are you doing? We were just talking about you. (Off the phone) Did you get my lucky pants from the cleaners?
Brett's secretary walks in with a pair of hockey pants.
Joe : They got the ginseng stain out.
Brett : That's great, you see those things are priceless, Billy Mosienko scored 3 goals in 21 seconds in those pants. (Ont he phone) Oh, yeah, Mikey... (Off the phone) OK, go on.
Joe : Clark Broderick at the director's meeting.
He throws Brett the phone.
Brett : Hey, Clarkie! How's Barbados? Yeah, you got the rule changes? Because the network asked me to liaise with you, that's why. They really want those changes, you know how long it took you guys to get a network TV contract. Oh, I'm just an agent, like Everest is just a mountain. I rep 14 of the top 20 scorers in this league. I control their endorsements, appearances and promotions. Without me, you can't get your stars to call a Bingo game!
Brett : OK, OK, Clarkie, I think that four
quarters, that makes sense. I mean, does that make sense to
you? And what the hell kind of game has three halves? All right, all right, listen, listen, ok... Calm
down, I'll tell you what, you do this for me and will back off those shoot-outs 'til next year. Oh, come
on! You thought I was wrong about that glowing puck, too. Hey, I got an idea, you talk to the boys, I'll wait on the line.
He puts his cell phone on his desk.
Brett : OK, what's next?
Joe : I had to book a flight to Hamilton.
Brett : Oh, were the flights to hell all full?
Joe : The Steelheads really want McNally back.
Home town boy and all, and they're just one game
out of the play-offs...
Brett : Who cares what Hamilton wants?
What were the league doing when they let them in?
Dropping acid? And what the hell kind of name is "Steelheads"?
Joe : I think it's a fish.
Brett : Yeah, I know it's a fish, Joe, that's my point, fish don't sell sports.
Joe : What about the Miami Dolphins?
Brett : Dolphins are mammals, mammals sell,
fish don't sell. All right, here, take the Albuquerque
group and tell them I would love to rep their franchise if we get happy on the money.
He picks up his cell phone.
Brett : Hey, Clarkie, it's like, I'm just... I'm waiting here. (To Joe) Albuquerque pants, rules, mammals, you see, why do I feel like I'm forgetting something.
In Brett's home in New York.
Andrea : You forgot me again!
Brett : I realise, you know, I put my job before our relationship. Well, I want you to know Andrea, I can change.
Andrea : Good, well change into a column on Versace spring collection, my deadline is in two hours.
Brett : OK, I mean it, from this second on I ignore all distractions or I am not...
His cell phone rings and he answers.
Brett : Brett Parker.
Looks worried as he shuts his phone.
Brett : It's the car. Listen, Andrea (kisses her on the cheek) I'm gonna call you, OK? Hey, you and I can go to that place in the Cape when I get back from Hamilton.
Andrea : You're going to Bermuda?
Brett : Huh, no, Canada.
Andrea : I was in Hamilton for a shoot last year, it's in Bermuda.
Brett : No, I know, but this a whole different kind of place.
Copps Coliseum, Hamilton, the Steelheads are at practice.
Coach Lloyd Gorman : This is Hamilton, you sons of bitches, not Anaheim! This town knows how to work!
Colleen Blessed, the Steelheads' President, and Ray Malone, the Steelheads' General Manager, are sitting watching the practice. Todd Maplethorpe is fighting with a fellow player.
Colleen Blessed : He's killing the high priced talent again.
Ray Malone : Well, that's why they call him Terminal Todd.
Colleen : So, what's your plan with Parker?
Ray : I'm gonna have lunch with him and I hope to have McNally back in the harness.
Colleen : With what money?
Ray : Why should we need money? We got him under contract for Pete's sake.
Colleen : Yeah, well, with Parker, it's always money.
On the ice, Maplethorpe is still fighting. Captain Mark Simpson intervenes.
Mark Simpson : Hey, knock it off!
Coach Gorman : That's right boys, knock it off! Save it for the game!
Ray is waiting on the street in front of the Coliseum, a limo pulls up and he knocks on the passenger window. It rolls down, Brett is on his cell phone.
Brett : Oh yeah, yeah, absolutely. (To Ray : I'm just going to finish this call, Ray.) So Mr. President, how is that Nike deal coming anyway?
He rolls his window back up.
At home, Michele Parker, Brett's daughter, is on the phone.
Michele Parker : So now I'm Mr. President.
Brett : What? No, no, I'm just scaring the natives with my black magic. Listen, uh, I'm in town for the day, wanna get together.
Michele : Yeah, like I'll drop everything to see you?
Brett : That's great, so I'll see you at Two Lanes at 5, ok? I gotta go.
He hangs up.
Ray : Hurry up, it's hotter than hell out here! (To himself :) Damn league, May and they haven't even started the play-offs yet.
Brett gets out of the limo.
Brett : All right.(Sniffs the air) Mmm, I see the steel mills are still in business. Let's get started.
Brett walks towards the Coliseum.
Ray : I thought we were going for lunch.
Brett : Yeah, but then I realised that we're in Hamilton, I didn't think the limo would fit in a drive-tru. Let's go!
In the Steelheads' offices.
Ray : You might want to show the General Manager of a big league team some respect.
Brett : Yeah, I might, but all I see is the General Manager of the Hamilton Steelheads, so...
Ray : Listen, you load of crap!
Brett : Ray, Ray, calm down. That was just a joke.
He walks towards a painting of Duff McArdle, the team's owner.
Brett : Speaking of jokes, how is the old man? He's still taking his medication, isn't he?
Ray : Mr. McArdle is fine. He lets me run this hockey operation as I see fit. And what I'd like to see right now is McNally sorry keister in uniform and on the ice.
Brett : I can't do that Ray, he's totally booked down in L.A. He's got licensing, appearances, and you know, of course, he's got his acting career going now.
Ray : Acting!
Brett : Yeah, he's got three episodes on a soap, "Love Mountain," it's actually pretty good, have you seen that?
Ray : He should be here right now, you've got no rights to hold him out like this!
Brett : Yes, I do. You still owe him that bonus.
Ray : $500,000.00 for 40 goals, he's only scored 38.
Brett : 43 if you count exhibition.
Ray : They don't count exhibition games, that's why they're called exhibition!
Brett : Wow, you're turning this really weird color, Ray. You should watch your BP. You might want to lose a few pounds, too.
Colleen opens the door to her office.
Brett : Well, madame President.
Colleen : Hello Parker, has Ray punched you yet?
Brett : No, not yet.
Colleen : He's got more restraint than I do.
Brett : Could we have a word in private?
Colleen : Certainly. (To Ray) Could you excuse us for a minute, Ray?
Brett : Excuse us, Ray.
Before Ray leaves, Brett motions to his pulse.
Colleen : After you.
They enter Colleen's office and she shuts the door.
Brett : So, what's the update?
Colleen : The Houston group has the cash.
Brett : Ah, that's good. And... what about the fans?
Colleen : In Houston?
Brett : No, in Hamilton. The league won't let a franchise move unless it loses local support.
Colleen : Right, which is why we agreed you'd hold out McNally. No McNally, no play-offs. No play-offs, no love.
Brett : Right, except your boss, of course. You know, McArdle, he's lived here all his life, he's not gonna want the team to move to Texas.
Colleen : The team is shortening his life.
Brett : Yeah, but you run his companies, not his health plan.
Colleen : You know the one thing I like about you Mr. Parker?
Brett : No, what's that?
Colleen : You know absolutely nothing about me.
Brett : And I'm very proud of that Ms. Blessed. All right, you handle McArdle. I gotta go pretend to talk to your GM.
Inside the Steelheads' locker room after practice. Al Tremblay is sitting with his laptop.
Todd Maplethorpe : OK, so let's say the team was gonna move...
Mark Simpson : It's not gonna to move.
Maplethorpe : Yeah, but just say, where would you wanna go?
Al Tremblay : Some place in the States.
They got decent tax laws, and... a real dollar, and you can
walk down the street without everybody telling you why you lost last night.
Simpson : That's because they don't care. I'd rather put up with the problems up here than to put up with that.
Maplethorpe : You gotta say that Simpsie, you're the captain.
Tremblay : Me, I've always dreamed of being someplace where no one knew me, no pressure.
Maplethorpe : I dream of finally making the play-offs.
Tremblay : Without McNally! He's a jerk but he puts the puck in the net.
Simpson : All we have to do is win this last game and we're in.
Maplethorpe : I just wish it wasn't Philadelphia.
Tremblay : We haven't beaten them all year.
Simpson : So what? What are we here for? We're here to play hockey. And we're here to win. What else is there?
Tremblay's computer beeps.
Tremblay : Caline de bine! General Dynamics went up 20 points. I made $14,000.00 during practice. American!
Ray Malone is looking out his office window, with Brett Parker sitting at his desk.
Brett : You gotta face the facts, Ray, you're not gonna win without McNally. Slammin' in those goals, and doing that cool salute.
Ray : Somebody's gonna run him for that someday.
Brett : We did a focus group, people love that salute.
Ray : Real hockey fans hate it!
Brett : We're broadening the base, Ray, you're living in the Dark Ages. Well, hey! You're living in Hamilton!
Ray : All right, now that's enough about the town, ok? Now, I wasn't gonna do this, but here. I came across it the other day.
Ray opens his desk drawer and pulls out a picture of him with a young boy in front of a hockey net. He hands it to Brett.
Brett : Yeah, so? So what? Take this. (Gives the picture back to Ray.) So what, Ray? Just because you happen to coach me when I was what, 12 there?
Ray : 9 to 14.
Brett : So? Does this mean I should ease up on you then?
Ray : This is who you were, a Hamilton kid. A good hockey player.
Brett : Not good enough to make it, though, right? Right Ray? So, whatever, you know? I had to find another way to make the game pay.
Ray : So you end up screwing your home town.
Brett : Listen ,not so loud on the home town stuff. I prefer that not getting around.
Ray : Hamilton is who you are!
Brett : I don't care who I am.
Ray : Every man cares who he is.
Brett : It got in my way. I got passed it.
Ray : You got passed... Huh. You can't...
Ray collapses on his desk.
Outisde the Coliseum, Brett watches as Ray is carried in an ambulance.
Colleen : I gotta get in there.
Brett walks back in the Coliseum.
Michele is waiting in a restaurant.
Later, Michele is at home with Brett.
Brett : Look, Michele, the guy died, you know, right in front of me, it was kind of a shock.
Michele : Get over yourself. Everybody forgets me.
Brett : Look, I'm sorry that I stood you up. From now on... You know I'm having a lot of trouble concentrating in this house.
Michele : And that subject change would be... avoidance, right?
Brett : Gimme a break.
Michele : Why?
Brett : I grew up here.
Michele : Yeah, and I live here.
Brett : My mother lives here.
Michele : Your mother goes to Florida whenever the weather is bad, in Hamilton that's all the time. And she's not just your mother you know?
Brett : I know.
Michele : I mean, she's my grandmother, too, it's not like you have exclusive rights to her.
Brett : OK. Look, let's start over. How is your mother?
Michele : I don't know, she doesn't call much from the ashram.
Brett : Your mother is a Buddhist?
Michele : Oh, you didn't know!
Brett : Well, you know, we don't talk much, and...
Michele : Yeah, that runs in the family. When I got early acceptance to McMaster, I kind of told her it was OK if she wanted to split for a while. I mean, all those years she put into me, she gotta get some time for herself, right?
Brett : Well, I guess that kind of means I'm your main parent now.
Brett : What's so funny?
Michele : My parent? I like that. I don't even know what to call you.
Brett : I don't know, what about dad?
Michele : I don't think so.
Brett : Why not?
Michele : "Dad" is something you earn, like major, or doctor...
Brett : Listen, I am your father, I paid the bills for 17 years.
Michele : I said earn it, not buy it. Look, I don't want to be unfriendly but the best thing you can do for me now is just keep sending cheques, it's only for a few more years, and then I'm out of your hair for good.
Brett : Michele, I don't want you out of my hair. Listen, I want to, I don't know, know you, or something. I want to be around you.
Michele : Yeah, like that other night in that restaurant, it was nice being together like that... dad.
At Ray Malone's funeral. Brett is catching up with coach Gorman.
Brett : Coach? Coach?
Gorman : What do you want?
Brett : Nothing, I just wanted to say, you know, how sorry I am.
Gorman : Sorry? For what? You didn't kill him sooner?
Brett : What?
Gorman : With despair. And anger, and heartbreak. I know that man 37 years, that's more years than you've been alive, and every one of them was a pleasure. You think someone's gonna be able to say about you when they plant you, Mr. Parker?
Brett : I don't think about that much.
Gorman : No, I guess you wouldn't.
Coach Gorman leaves. Brett's pager beeps. He walks by a limo and the person inside calls him, it's Duff McArdle.
Duff McArdle : Hey slick! Come and have a Dow!
Brett : A what?
Duff : A Dow. (Shows Brett a bottle of beer) Ray's brand. I haven't had one in 30 years. Of course, in the night in question, I had about 30 years worth.
Brett : No, thanks.
Duff : The team owner wants you to have a pop, son!
Brett gets in the limo.
Duff : A Dow. I love a beer with just one syllable. Simple, like me.
Opens a Dow bottle and hands it to Brett.
Brett : No, thank you.
Duff : I built my fortune on hard work and slag. You ever been near hot slag?
Brett : No.
Duff : Well, I haven't a single nose hair left. 'Cause of the slag, I mean, not because I've been tweezing them like some cake boy. Eskaweewee, that wouldn't have been smart. Anyhoo, I have a proposition for you. Have a Bugle. They're the tasty snack that's made of corn.
Brett : That's the proposition?
Duff : Ray loved the Bugles, and here's to him.
Duff swigs his beer.
Duff : He was like a brother to me, you know?
Brett : Yeah, well, he was kinda like a father to me, so...
Duff : Is that why you killed him, some Oedipus thing?
Brett : What is it with you people? I did not kill him!
Duff : Of course you did! My first thought was I was gonna hunt you down and kill you. I even brought my gun with me. I left it in the trunk, though, you can't bring a riffle to a funeral, I learned that lesson. No, I said I'm not gonna shoot him, I had a better idea.
Brett : I'm glad.
Duff : I said don't kill the amoral cut-throat rat bastard, hire him.
Brett : Hire me?
Duff : For the Steelheads. You like that
name? I thought of that name. The steelhead's a fish, you
Brett : Yeah.
Duff : The anadromous rainbow trout : fights like a bugger.
Brett : Well... What are you talking about, hire me?
Duff : You're gonna be my new General Manager.
Brett : You are crazy.
Duff : What do you say?
Brett : I have no reason to take that job.
Duff : Maybe you'll find one.
Brett : On the way to the airport? I don't think so.
Opens the door to the limo and gets out.
Duff : Strange things happen, kid.
Brett : Not to me!
Duff : Strange things!
Brett is in his limo, he pulls down the window and dials a number on his cell phone. As he looks out, he sees himself as a young kid playing hockey in the street with Ray Malone, just like in the picture. Ray looks at him in the limo, and it pulls away.
The phone rings and Andrea answers. Brett is back at the Steelhead's Offices.
Andrea : Hello?
Brett : Hi, don't go to the airport.
Andrea : Ever again?
Brett : No, now. I'm not on the flight. They've offered me a job up here.
Andrea : What kind of job?
Brett : General Manager of the Hamilton Steelheads.
Andrea : You're not taking it, are you?
Brett : No, no, of course not. You know, I am trying to move this team to Houston. Now, if I did become GM, I could have them out of here in no time.
Andrea : You've got...
Brett : I have to tell you this, all right, here's the thing : The Houston group has a company in on their concessions, it's a parking and beverage. It's worth millions of dollars and all I have to do is get the Steelheads to move there.
Andrea : Isn't that a conflict of interest?
Brett : No, there's no conflict, the whole thing is in my interest.
Andrea : What about your agency?
Brett : Uh, well, I could put the agency into a blind trust, I suppose.
Andrea : You've decided to take this job, haven't you?
Brett : No, no, no. Of course not.
Andrea : Liar.
Brett : Andy, I don't lie to you.
Andrea : Sure you do. I don't mind it, usually you're just trying to make me feel good. Except this time it's not working.
Andrea hangs up.
At Copps Coliseum, Colleen is in the stands watching the practice. Brett comes and sits next to her.
Brett : Hey.
Colleen : What are you doing here?
Brett : I'm working for you.
Colleen : You... you can't be. Duff told me he was gonna make the offer, but I mean... You can't we have a deal.
Brett : This is better. Look we have to get Hamilton to hate this team, right?
Colleen : So?
Brett : So, I'm holding up McNally, and that's good, but it's not enough. Now that I'm GM here I can do anything.
Colleen : Like?
Brett : What if I got rid of Mark Simpson?
Colleen : Get rid of the most loved guy in the history of the city? They’d skin you in the parking lot.
Brett : Yeah, yeah, exactly. Fan support evaporates and you and I are on a flight to Houston.
Colleen : Yeah, except we're passed the trade deadlines.
Brett : I'm not gonna trade him, I'm gonna make him quit.
Colleen : Make Mark Simpson quit?
Brett : Yeah.
Colleen : Are you nuts?
Brett : No, just diabolical. See ya.
By the ice, Brett is talking to the team.
Brett : All right guys, listen up. I understand that this is a difficult thing. You know, I knew Ray. I knew his as well as you did, better maybe. And I realise the team is having a tough time, but I think this is due to a lack of goal realisation.
Simpson : I thought it was from the lack of goal scoring.
Brett : Well, I plan to change that. First of all, I'm working on getting McNally to come back.
Tremblay : You're not going to make us play with glowing pucks, are ya?
Brett : Well, maybe if they glowed you'd stop more of them. Look, as many of you know, I didn't want to take this job, all right?
Maplethorpe : But... you killed the last guy so you had to take it.
Brett : Look, you guys can think whatever you want about me, all right? Whatever. But there are gonna be some changes around here. Those of you who are tough enough will survive these... changes. And I'm not sure how many of you that will be, but I guess we'll find that out, won't we? Thanks a lot. Oh, Mark, you want to drop by my office once you're dressed. (As he leaves) Thanks guys!
Brett is on the phone in his new office.
Brett : Oh yeah, and send me the deal memo on the Dubois extension. Uh? Yeah, yeah, and look me into the agency e-mail under a phony name.
Renata Delassandro is standing in Brett's door.
Renata : Hi.
Brett : Hi.
Renata : I'm Renata. Uh, will you be needing me?
Brett : Is that a trick question?
Renata : Congratulations, you're the 23rd executive in a row who answered that line in the same humorous manner.
Brett : (On the phone) Joe, I gotta go, ok? All right.
Brett hangs up.
Brett : Uh... Renata. I'm sorry, and you would be...
Renata : Well, I would be a neuro-surgeon but hmm, I couldn't stand the sound of the bone saw, so I decided on a career in the personal assistant field. I worked for Ray Malone, so... I don't know if you're keeping me on.
Brett : Oh, right, right. And what do you do exactly?
Renata : Well, I can say things like : "Your limousine caught fire."
Brett : My limousine caught fire?
Renata : No, that was just a test.
Brett : Oh...
Renata : But Mark Simpson is here to see you.
Brett : All righty, well I guess you got the job! Thanks. So why don't you go ahead and send Mark Simpson in. We need to discuss his retirement.
Renata : Mark will never retire.
Brett : Yeah he will, he just doesn't know that yet.
Brett : Thanks Renata!
Mark Simpson comes in.
Brett : Hey.
Simpson : You wanted to see me?
Brett : Yeah, well, I'm the new guy, you're the captain. Come on in. Close the door.
Simpson closes the door.
Brett : Sit down, please. Look, I thought this would be a good opportunity for us. We could sit down, you can tell me a little bit about the team, I can tell you about my plans.
Simpson : All right, well we're in tough most
nights. We can't out-talent most teams but we play the
trap, look for the opportunities...
Brett : Mark, Mark, Mark, you don't have to talk to me like that. I'm not some drunk depressed reporter with a mortgage and a deadline. I'm the guy who's marketing this team. See, what I want to do is go for this whole "Outlaw" kind of thing, you know, kind of like the Oakland Raiders.
Simpson : They play football.
Brett : Maybe create a Dennis Rodman for hockey.
Simpson : That's basketball.
Brett : That's marketing. You see, I'm gonna create a storyline around the Steelheads.
Simpson : What is this, Pro Wrestling?
Brett : Now those guys are brilliant. They don't even have a sport, Mark, they sell stories, that's what I'm talking about. And this is where you come in.
Simpson : No, this is where I go out. You're not talking about hockey.
Brett : Mark, this is the new hockey.
Simpson : The "new" hockey. You know I can't even look at the tape of my 4ooth goal because it's got that glowing puck on it.
Brett : Puck? Puck, schmuck.
Simpson : I don't like you, and I don't like what you do. Storylines, marketing, that's not hockey.
Brett : Ok, well, what is it?
Simpson : It's... it's where I'm from.
Brett : And that's it. Ok, listen. Hockey is a river of money, that you swimin or you drown, all right? So, you're with me or you're not?
Simpson : Not.
Brett : Fine, you gotta expect a trade then.
Simpson : You can't trade me, I'm from Hamilton. I took a pay cut to come here.
Brett : What moron of an agent let you do that?
Simpson : My wife.
Brett : Oh...
Simpson : Don't trade me.
Brett : Well, you're not helping me.
Simpson : Help you? What does that have to do with anything.
Brett : You're not helping me. I mean, I know this used to be the Mark Simpson team, but I'm telling you this team belongs to me now. And you got to help me.
Brett : To be honest, I don't see that you have a choice.
Simpson : You're wrong, I do, I can quit.
Simpson leaves. Brett follows him. Simpson is in the hall talking with Renata.
Brett : Listen Mark, I want you to know that I respect your decision, ok. We'll retire your sweater, we'll have a Mark Simpson night.
Simpson : Bite me.
He leaves again.
Brett (to Renata) : You see that.
Megan Atwell : Excuse me, Mr. Parker?
Brett : Hi. You are...
Renata : This is Megan Atwell...
Megan : ...from the Crown Attorney's Office, it's about your daughter, Michele Parker, and the money she embezzled.
Later, at home in the kitchen.
Michele : You're not my parent!
Brett : Hey, listen, check your chromosomes, all right!
Michele : What?
Brett : Half of them, they're mine!
Michele : So what?
Brett : So what?
Michele : So parenting isn't about biology!
Brett : I know that!
Michele : It's about being there.
Brett : Right!
Michele : 24/7. Every year!
Brett : I was there!
Michele : When?
Brett : Listen, I never missed a...
Michele : payment? Ah, fine!
Brett : Fine!
Michele : Fine! You're not my father, you're my banker. I'm glad we sorted that out.
Brett : Listen, this woman, she's bringing charges against you.
Michele : She's bluffing. She just wants me to turn in the other kids, which I won't do.
Brett : Just tell me what happened.
Michele : I had a chance to buy into a snowboard rental deal, I got 10% of business for 12 grand up front.
Brett : Wait a minute, where did you get 12 grand?
Michele : The bio ethics club, I'm treasurer.
Brett : My daughter into ethics, wow.
Michele : There is no club, dad. I made it up to get the money.
Brett : Aaahhh... but you flipped in to that snowboard thing.
Michele : And it would have worked except for the audit.
Brett : I know that feeling.
Michele : I mean they never audit before the end of term. I offered them board against their money, but they turned me down.
Brett is smiling.
Michele : Are you ok?
Brett : Yeah, I'm just very proud of you, that's all. Listen, I don't want you to worry about this, all right? No, no, no, your dad is on top of this.
Michele : It's too late.
Brett : No, no, you cut deals with these things.
Michele : I mean, it's too late for you to be a father.
Michele leaves the kitchen.
Brett : You think you're the only one who didn't have a father! I didn't really have a father either, you know. I don't think I told you that, did I?
Michele : You never told me anything.
Brett : All right, well, my father was a hockey player. He was a career minor leaguer, he was always on the road and I hardly ever saw the guy.
Michele : But you made up for it with me.
Brett : No I was terrified of you. My dad, he got killed driving home from a game one night. And I lost him for good. So when you were born, I was your age, I figured that you'd be better off if I stayed away.
Michele : So you stayed away from me so that I wouldn't lose you?
Brett : Yeah.
Michele : That's um... stupid, dad. It's really, really stupid.
She leaves and shuts the door behind her. Brett walks through the house. In the living room, he sees himself as a young boy watching hockey with his mom. Ray shows up.
Ray : The fast one shouldn't have chased that guy, his partner had him.
Brett : Ray. You're dead.
Ray : Not in the past I'm not.
Brett : Right.
Ray : Here, want a Bugle? They're the tasty snack that's made of corn.
Brett : What are you doing here?
Ray : You're thinking about your past, and I'm part of it. I mean, a boy's coach is important to him, especially with your dad being away and all.
Phone rings. Young Brett answers.
Young Brett : Hi, dad.
Brett : That's the Saturday call.
Young Brett : Great, I got a hat trick this morning.
Ray : He was in the Hershey that year.
Brett : Whatever, he was always somewhere.
Ray : Yeah, that's how it is when you're chasing a dream.
Brett : Come on, he should've been home.
Young Brett : No, that's ok, I understand.
Brett : Look at this, he shouldn't have been on the road at 37, when he was never gonna make it anyway. Hockey made him a sucker, it's never gonna do that to me.
Ray : Is that why you live like this? Money, power, all that crap.
Brett : You gonna tell me something better.
Ray : I could, but that would be cheating. Well, I gotta go, there's a big game in heaven. Toronto - Montreal.
Brett : Toronto - Montreal.
Ray : They play every night. It's heaven isn't it?
Every one in the living room disappears. Brett is standing alone.
Colleen : Figure you'll survive the day.
Brett : Odds are good.
Colleen : Simpson announced his retirement due to differences with management . There's a newser at 11.
Brett : We'll ace it.
Colleen : What do you mean "we," white man.
Brett : Oh, fine, I'll do it alone.
Colleen : You're not worried.
Brett : I'm never worried. Besides, that's ok, I'm gonna spin that thing away from Simpson.
Colleen : Not if you turned up naked.
Brett : Oh, let's not get into your fantasies here.
Colleen : You can't get into my fantasies, you're too small.
Brett : Oh. By the way, I signed McNally this morning.
Colleen : What?
Brett : I got him out of that soap opera, that thing was a piece of crap anyway.
Colleen : Why would you sign McNally? We can win this last game if he plays, we'd be in the play-offs.
Brett : Yeah, for one lousy round.
Colleen : We had a deal.
Brett : Look, we still have a deal, the Hamilton Steelheads are gonna be in Texas, they're gonna be there by June, nothing to worry about. Look, if we win a round, it's gonna help the price.
Colleen : But we don't want to help the price, we can't do anything to strengthen cash flow, the league wants to keep us here, remember?
Brett : I can handle the league.
Colleen : Oh my God.
Brett : What?
Colleen : You're getting invested. You care about this team.
Brett : Please, nothing's change. I'm here because I want to move this team, to a market that deserves it. And so what if we win a couple of games on the way out, I don't see what's bad about that.
Colleen : You're back on the pond with the other little boys.
Brett : Oh, please!
Colleen : You want to win.
Brett : Look, nothing's changed, you know, we still have our deal.
Colleen : That might have been true... yesterday. Right now, I don't know what we have, and you don't either, do you?
Colleen is back in her office, she picks up the phone and pushes an auto-dial button.
Colleen : Yeah. Hi, it's me. Change of plan. Call in the note now. As in today. By end of business then, just bankrupt my hockey team.
Copps Coliseum, Game Day, 8 a.m.
Brett (on the phone): Look, Renata, I haven't seen my daughter since yesterday. It's not like her to disappear, just keep calling around for me, ok? (He hangs up) Maybe it is like her, how the hell would I know?
Phone rings. He answers.
Brett : Michele? No, no, I thought that you were... What? What do you mean they won't let McNally through customs? Come on, he was born in Canada! No, no, he doesn't need a work permit, he's got dual citizenship. Just tell McNally to go back to the custom's guy and admit he's Canadian.
Renata (on the intercom) : Mr. Parker?
Brett : What!
Renata : There's trouble with the players.
Brett : I'll be right down.
By the ice, coach Gorman is reading his newspaper.
Brett : What's going on?
Gorman : Take a look.
On the ice, the players can't seem to skate.
Brett : What's gotten into them?
Gorman : Maybe it's this.
He shows Brett his newspaper with the headline "Steelheads will go bankrupt."
Collen walks in, smiling.
Colleen : Hello.
Brett : Hi.
Colleen : Hi.
Brett (pointing to the newspaper) : That's you.
Colleen : That? Yes. I need to move the team to Houston. You didn't think you were my only plan, Brett? See ya.
Brett : See ya. It's not over, Colleen, I never lose!
His cell phone rings. He answers.
Brett : What!
Michele : Daddy? It's Michele.
Brett : Michele, where the hell are you? I looked in 111 donut shops last night.
Michele : I'm in jail. They took my fingerprints.
Brett : Look, stay put, all right.
Michele : Like I have a choice.
He hangs up.
Brett drops his bond on a desk and Michele joins him. They walk out.
Michele : So let me get this straight, I'm in your custody.
Brett : Yeah, custody, don't think about it that way.
Michele : Yeah, but I have to live with you.
Brett : Yeah, and they say we have to do this community service thing, you know, together.
Michele : Couldn't I just go to prison?
Brett : It's not gonna be that bad.
Michele : I wanna bet.
Brett : Listen, I'll tell you what, I'm gonna give you some cab fare and I want you to meet me back at the ranch. OK? I gotta go.
Michele :Where are you going?
Brett : I gotta go talk to somebody, I'll see ya!
At a community centre, a poster reads Mark Simpson's Hockey for Kids.
Brett : You know, you're playing in the rain out here.
Simpson : I'm aware of that.
Brett : Listen Mark, I need to tell you something I would never tell anybody else.
Simpson : You're gay.
Brett : No. I was at my parents' house the other night and I had this vision, not vision, a dream or something, of me as a kid again, and I was watching hockey. And I didn't really understand what this was suppose to mean to me, but I think I do now. All right, hockey is not just about money.
Simpson : I know that, I told you that.
Brett : Yeah, all right, I knowk, but I'm starting to get it now, I'm starting to remember, hockey is.. Mark it's an expression of joy and community in the face of bleak winter!
Simpson : What the hell are you talking about?
Brett : I don't know, we had this guy Ian... I don't know, that doesn't matter. Look, this game is about home, like you said, it's where you're from, it's where I'm from.
Simpson : I gotta hand it to you, you're a pretty tricky guy. You almost had me believe in this.
Simpson turns back.
Brett : OK, the whole truth, all right! I was part of a plan to move the franchise away from here. That's why I took this job. But now... What now, I don't know what I'm supposed to do now, but what I do know is that if you play tonight this team's got a better chance of winning and staying in Hamilton. This isn't good for me, but it's good for everybody else, so I guess that's what I oughta try and... do.
Simpson : That's a great speech Mr. Parker, the problem is, it comes from you.
Announcer #1 : You know what, you can back up the truck and roll out the clichés : it's really is do or die time for the Hamilton Steelheads tonight, without captain Mark Simpson.
Announcer #2 : Well, you have to think that they're happy to have McNally back. The Steelheads have to be missing MArk Simpson even more.
Announcer #3 : Et la grande vedette de Hamilton Ritchie McNally va être sur la glace ce soir pour les Steelheads. Et bien Michel saviez-vous que le Steelhead, c'est un poisson? Un poisson qu'on peut d'ailleurs pêcher dans les eaux du Lac Ontario.
Jake Nelson, the Philadelphia coach is getting ready for an interview.
Jake Nelson : Just a minute, just a minute, ok, go ahead.
CTV Reporter : With me is Philadelphia Head Coach Jake Nelson. Coach you face a Hamilton team in seeming disarray tonight.
Nelson : Yeah, you know why they're in such a mess.
Reporter : Why is that.
Nelson : I'll tell you: Brett Parker, you let this guy take over. He's such a twerp, he gases his good captain, I'm telling you it's enough to make you puke.
Reporter : Well, don't sugar-coat it coach, tell us how you really feel.
Nelson : I'm gonna lay a beating on them tonight, and I'll tell you why, the great fans of Hamilton will chase this guy back to New York, along with his jerk friends. This guy is a rat of the first choice.
Reporter : There you have it, the words of Jake Nelson. Back to you John.
Nelson : Am I great or what?
Reporter : You make my job easy.
Nelson : Anytime, kid.
The singing of the National Anthem. Duff, Colleen, and Brett are in the owner's box.
Brett : Duff?
Duff : No talking during the anthem.
Duff : I can't abide talking during the anthem, it's disrespectful. Also, I want total silence if you ever hear anything by Charlie Chamberlain.
Brett : Who?
Duff : The old guy with the hat on Don Messer's Jubilee. I don't know why they ever cancelled that show, with it and everybody in it is dead. What you got in the package?
Brett : It's my lucky pants. Billy Mosienko scored 3 goals in 21 seconds he was wearing these pants.
Duff : Hey, Colleen, Parker brought his lucky pants
Colleen : He's gonna need them.
Announcer #1 : We're under way with the last game of the Steelheads' regular season and maybe their last game ever in Hamilton.
Goes on with hockey commentary. McNally scores and does his cool salute. As he does, he his rammed in the boards by a Philadelphia player. He is carried away, unconscious.
Duff : I don't think those pants of yours are so damn lucky.
Colleen : Looks like the end of another strategy, Mr. Parker.
Parker : We can still win.
Colleen : Get a grip, you don't want to win.
Hockey commentary. Philadelphia scores their third goal.
Simpson, in hockey gear, walks to the Steelheads bench.
Maplethorpe : Simpsie! What are you doing here?
Simpson : I'm here to play hockey, ladies.
Players : All right!
He jumps on the ice.
Hockey commentary. Simpson shoots and scores. The Steelheads are down by one. A Philadelphia player picks a fight with Simpson. Maplethorpe intervenes.
Maplethorpe : I'm asking you not to touch Mr. Simpson.
Hockey commentary. Maplethorpe scores.
With only a couple of seconds remaining in the game, someone trips Simpson and the whistle blows.
Duff : Penalty! Penalty!
Brett : Come on, that's a penalty shot! (Referee points) Yes, thank you.
Simpson has a penalty shot. He scores!
Announcer #1 : He did it. 4-3 Hamilton. The Steelheads are in the play-offs! The Steelheads are in the play-offs! This one is all over, an incredible penalty shot goal by Mark Simpson makes franchise history. This is one for the books. The Steelheads are going to the post-season. A penalty shot by Simpson clinches the victory for Hamilton.
Brett sees himself as a kid with Ray in the crowd. They're smiling at him.
Jake Nelson watches his team walk towards their locker room.
Nelson : Brutal game, brutal game. Losing to a team like that, you should be ashamed of yourself.
Brett : Hey, Nelson, nice try.
Nelson : You know you're pretty cocky punk, I gotta tell you that. That game meant nothing to us at-all. Wait 'til the play-offs we're gonna whip your ass.
Brett : Is that right?
Nelson : Yeah, that's right.
Brett : I guess you just didn't have them ready tonight, good thing I'm not your GM.
Nelson : You know, I'm gonna take personal delight in beating any team you're connected with, jerk!
Brett : Hmm-mm, ok, good, good.
Nelson : Brown suit, black shoes. What a loser!
The Steelheads are celebrating in the locker room, Brett calls Andrea.
Andrea : Hello?
Brett : We won!
Andrea : That's great sweetie. So am I going to see you tomorrow?
Brett : This is the thing. We got into the play-offs! So I'm going to have to stay... a little longer. Are you there?
Andrea hangs up.
Brett : I'm starting to lose you, Andy?
At night, Duff is making the rounds. Brett is in the hallway.
Duff : All right, who the hell is that?
Brett : Me, Duff, it's Brett.
Duff : Oh yeah, OK.
Brett : You're here a little late, are you?
Duff : I live here.
Brett : You live in Copps Coliseum?
Duff : I don't like how the house feels anymore... since the wife passed on. Where do you think you're going anyway?
Brett : I don't know, I was... I don't know. I have no idea. See ya!
Gets ready to leave, but turns back.
Brett : Listen, I think there's something I should probably tell you. Colleen is trying to sell this team.
Duff : Of course she is! And I'll pay her a mighty bonus if she does.
Brett : I've been working on that, with her.
Duff : Yeah, well, that's not surprising with the deal you made in Houston. Parking and beverage. Gee.
Brett : You know that.
Duff : Oh, yeah, I'm not as crazy as I seem, which is a good thing giving how crazy I seem.
Brett : I don't understand, you want to move this team, too.
Duff : Part of me does, it keeps losing money. I put Colleen on that. Part of me wants to keep it here, that's where you come in.
Brett : Listen, I don't care if the team stays in Hamilton.
Duff : Maybe you don't, maybe you do. Everyone keeps telling me that you're lower than the postal union.
Brett : Yeah.
Duff : Ray Malone kept telling me you're alright.
Brett : Ray did?
Duff : Yeah. He kept saying you had unfinished business in Hamilton, and one day you'd come back and stay.
Brett : Listen, I am definitely not staying in Hamilton.
Duff : We're in the play-offs, you gotta stay.
Brett : Yeah, I know. For now, but then I'm gone once they're over. See ya, Duff.
Duff : And those are not Billy Mosienko's pants! Maroon and white, I make them out to be Hershey Bear colours. Your dad's last team.
Brett : Yeah, my dad's last team. You're right. They aren't lucky, they're just his. I don't know why I hang on to them.
Duff : No one knows why they do anything anymore. Some things you just have to hang on to. And I'll be keeping you in my high beams, I'll tell you that much.
They both leave separately.
Outside the Coliseum, Michele is waiting in her car.
Michele : Hey. Need a ride?
Brett : You have a car?
Michele : Yeah, kind of. I thought you might need a ride back to my place.
Brett : You mean "our" place.
Michele : Don't push your luck, if it weren't for the court order, you'd be at the motel 6.
Brett : Why, do you have some kind of wild social life I should know about.
Michele : Not that it's any of your business, but I happened to be saving myself.
Brett : For who?
Michele : Eric Lindros, you know him?
Brett : I didn't even know that you liked hockey.
Michele : Yeah, I don't. So, are you gonna hook me up?
Brett : I've never met him.
Michele : You're such a liar.
Brett : I know, sometimes it's for a good cause.
Michele : And sometimes not.
The Copps Coliseum sign reads "This Saturday Steelheads vs. Philadelphia"